The out of office messages from my good friend and fairy tale comber Jan-Loic Capricciosa are so exciting that I just have to share them.
I’m not here. I’m still headed for the orange president’s country. So I do not have time to answer emails.
I’m rather busy fighting huge waves and an angry wind that just doesn’t seem to want to die down. The ocean is particularly bad-tempered and has been violently attacking my ship for days on end. My ship creaks chillingly, deep in the hull and high up in the mast.
Talking about chillingly. The ocean was so ferocious that my fairytale-van went overboard. If not for one mighty cast with my Kraken-fishing-rod and a superhuman effort reeling it in back in, the van would be lost at the bottom of the ocean.
A Kraken-fishing-rod is very similar to a regular fishing rod, but many times bigger and with steel wire at least two inches thick. If the thread is any thinner, the Kraken simply pulls it apart as if it is dental floss.
A Kraken on the other hand looks very much like an octopus, but a hundred times bigger. Like the octopus, the Kraken has eight powerful arms. But in a fight those meters-long arms are the least of your worries. Because just like an octopus, the hidious sea monster has three hearts, which make the Kraken by far the bravest of all mythical animals.
More preferably than facing a Kraken, I fight humongous waves. Although, it is long known, amongst ‘connoisseurs’ like me, that a Kraken turned inside out and left to dry on a washing line for about an hour or two can be quite sweet and friendly. Three times as sweet and friendly as any other mythical animal. But that aside.
It will take some more time before I reach my destination.
Until then, if the Kraken doesn’t wake up!
Or like they say in Mangodouro: MBDKQavaTsjie Kdatta, badangatte Krakus Bedan!
(Ps: The key is under the mat!)
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